Heather's Millions

So Heather Mills gets the $48 million settlement & says she's thrilled--this is after demanding $200 mil. And being offered $50 mil by Paul last fall, an offer she laughed at & turned down. So sad! Could any of us live on a mere $48 million! Oh boo hoo.
Now maybe she can afford to go out & buy some decent clothes instead of that 70's patchwork pantsuit piece of wierdness she was wearing in court. Euuwww! What's wrong with that girl?

Real Housewives of NYC

Ok, you've gotta see this show: Tuesday nights at 10:00 p.m. on Bravo, but then they replay it all week long, Bravo-style.
I started watching it for the clothes---which I admit are all fine & lovely---but now I'm hooked on it for the insanity of these Manhattan mavins. OMG, especially Alex, who met her husband on an "International Internet Dating Site" (she can't just admit it's eHarmony???), hired a French nanny so that her kids would learn to speak French (she doesn't), and named these poor hapless boys "Johann" and "Francois".
She and her equally unappealing husband spend most of their time complimenting each other on how beautiful they are, what fabulous taste they have, how lucky they are, and how fat their bank account is.
They go shopping in St. Bart's ("we would never think of shopping without each other. We are each other's stylist...") and she tries on an assortment of hideous designer dresses, none of which is under $2500. She buys about 5 of them but it's a kinda futile attempt to look like she knows what she's doing fashionwise. Euuuwwww!!!
So she blabs on about moving up in society, getting better friends, getting invited to better parties. He manages a boutique hotel, she works in "visual merchandising" (translation: she's a window dresser at Macy's, but whatev). I really don't think they're getting invited anywhere any too soon.
The saddest part of all: she finally admits she's from KANSAS!!!!! I laughed so hard Nyquil came out my nose!
Tune in, it's a real blend of hilarity, pathos, soporific dialog, and some pretty interesting fashion on the side.

The Flipperetto

Just for those of you who thought you owned every shoe you ever needed: here is the flipper stiletto. Perfect for puddle-jumping, rainy days, beach vacations. And so flattering on the foot. Great colors, too. My friend Sharon sent me these in an e-mail, I thought they were hilarious!

Wellness House Birthday Luncheon

Tons of ladies, and lots of men too, attended the Birthday Party Luncheon for Wellness House, a support system and a place to go for cancer patients and their families started by the amazing Cookie Beam 20 years ago. Wellness House has helped hundreds of women navigate their way through the terror of diagnosis, through treatment, and on to wellness.
And guess what? There was some style there, too...

Now this is real style: Marisa, who has just completed her treatment for lymphoma, was celebrating Wellness House's 20th birthday in a brown & white striped sweater, brown print hoodie with fleece lining, pearls, jeans, and best of all: her own glorious bald head. Be proud to be bald, Marisa! You earned it! Best of all, she is now cancer-free. And hair grows back.

One of the most important things a woman can remember when dressing is: length, length, length. It's all about the verticle, Baby. These two ladies really got it right: Judy has on a long black velvet coat which is perfect for this kind of weather, goes over anything, and has the added advantage of making her look slimmer and taller. Plus: fabulous black and white bag!

Karyn, who's already tall, adds to the visual effect with the verticle lines of the scarf. And lots of cool chunky jewelry, which she had just purchased there at the luncheon! Must have accessories, righto? That's what separates us from the lower species.

Happy Birthday, Wellness House. You do a lot of people a lot of good. Here's to another 20 years!

Project Runway

Aaahhh---Project Runway. A fashionista's dream t.v. show. I watched the finale last night and I've gotta tell you: I think Christian is a darling little gay man (like a little designing Keebler elf!)and a very creative designer, but who's gonna wear those clothes? I mean, that feather thing--all I could think is how much that would itch & shed all over the place like a molting pigeon. Bleah.

But he made Posh smile, big deal. Fierce.

I voted for Rami & I'm obviously one of maybe 5 people that did. But his clothes were at least wearable! I loved both the antique lace evening gown and the black one, too. Not that I'd have anywhere to wear either one, but they could hang in the closet and I could admire them, like lovely extravagant works of art. OMG I've lived in Yakima too long.

Can't wait til next season!

Bikini Babe

Oh, if only we could all look this cute in a bikini! Well we would if we were all 6, which is the perfect age to be wearing one. This is a Roxy, and Olivia deemed it the best bikini in Maui. Which I believe it was. Pink & green, little pink ruffle around the bottom--more than darling. Wish I was 6.

Little Black Dress

This is a most excellent LBD--Cindy was on her way to Ray's in Maui for dinner wearing this frock--note the detail: shirred neckline, tiny cargo pockets, slim fabric belt & the buttons down the front. Truly fabulous!!!! And don't expect to pick one up at your local Macy's; she got this on a little jaunt to Paris. Oh well....

Airport Attire

Ok, so i haven't blogged in two months--well, I was on vacation. And what a great vacation it was!

Here's my main concern: after spending a lot of time in airports the past two months, my concern is WHY DO PEOPLE WHO ARE FLYING DRESS AS IF THEY'RE IN THEIR OWN BEDROOM?????

I mean I saw some really disgusting clothes on these planes! People are wearing their pajama pants! Grey sweats from Wal-Mart! They're carrying pillows! I hardly have room to put my own butt in those tiny little seats, why would anyone want a big ol' dirty-looking pillow in there with them? I saw a grown woman in denim overalls. I mean, omg, overalls on someone my age are ridiculous unless you happen to be cleaning out a barn. But think about this: how did she expect to negotiate an airplane toilet in overalls? That may have occurred to her later.

And don't even get me started on Crocs. Ubiquitous. Ridiculous. Unless you're under 5 years old.

Why do women wear boots to go through an airport? They may look good but when it comes to security lines, you're slowing everyone down, Honey. Next time try the slip-ons. And heels? Much as I love them, they make no sense for all the hiking one has to do down the airport concourse.

I stood around the Kahului airport waiting for some style to show up (it took several trips) & I've gotta say, I finally did find one great-looking woman, she was from Bellevue, she'd just arrived, and she was wearing this cute lime-green tunic with black leggings. Doesn't she look fabulous?

And it all makes sense: it's comfortable, it looks good with flats, it didn't arrive all wrinkled, and--this is important--when you get to a warm climate, you take off the leggings and voila'--you've got your sundress on. She told me it was from Victoria's Secret. Who knew?

Anyway, as far as traveling clothes go I can certainly understand everyone's desire to be comfortable. Especially on long flights, it makes sense to wear something in which you can really relax. But there are some compromises to be made here. No one needs to wear sweats or pajama pants. Here are some of my airplane rules:

1. Wear something that doesn't wrinkle. If that means you have to go to Chico's, do it. Something knit is good.

2. Wear slip-on flat shoes that can get you through security quickly and that you can walk (or run) for miles in without crying or bleeding, you big baby.

3. Wear dark colors; traveling makes you dirty.

4. Often a skirt makes more sense than jeans; it's comfortable and still looks decent.

5. If you're going somewhere warm, start out with a skirt, tights, a tank top, and a sweater. That way when you get there, you can take off the tights & the sweater and you're ready to go.

6. Layer things so that if the plane is too cold or too hot you can add or subtract.

7. Try to find two really great-looking, coordinated leather bags for carry-on so you're not schlepping Safeway shopping bags and Eddie Bauer backpacks.

8. Remember you're allowed a carry-on and a "handbag or purse". That "handbag" can be an extra-large Jessica-Simpson size hobo if you really have a lot of stuff to carry.

9. If you're going to wear sweats, make it a nice matching track suit in a dark color.

10. I always pack extra sox for when my feet get cold!

11. Pack a change of clothes in your carry-on. Not only for when your checked luggage doesn't arrive, but you'll have something to change into when the kid next to you barfs in your lap or the turbulance causes your gin tonic to erupt all over your sweater.